/* Global Styling */ body{ background: #f1f1f1; font-size:16px; line-height:1.4; font-family: sans-serif;} .amp-wp-post-content p, .amp-wp-content.the_content{ font-family: sans-serif;} a { color: #312C7E; text-decoration: none } .clearfix, .cb { clear: both } amp-iframe{ max-width: 100%; margin-bottom : 20px; } amp-anim { max-width: 100%; } .amp-wp-article amp-addthis{display: inherit;margin-top: 20px;margin-left: -10px;} amp-wistia-player {margin:5px 0px;} .alignleft{ margin-right: 12px; margin-bottom:5px; float: left; } .alignright{ float:right; margin-left: 12px; margin-bottom:5px; } .aligncenter{display: block; text-align:center; margin: 0 auto } #statcounter{width: 1px;height:1px;} ol, ul {list-style-position: inside;} .hide{display:none} .amp-logo a {text-align: center;font-size: 20px;font-weight: bold;line-height: 1;padding: 4px 3px;margin: 0;} /* Template Styles */ .amp-wp-content, .amp-wp-title-bar div { max-width: 1000px; margin: 0 auto; } figure.aligncenter amp-img { margin: 0 auto; } /* Slide Navigation code */ .nav_container{ padding: 18px 15px; background: #312C7E; color: #fff; text-align: center } amp-sidebar{ width: 250px; } amp-sidebar{background:#efefef;} .amp-sidebar-image{ line-height: 100px; vertical-align:middle; } .amp-close-image{ top: 15px; left: 225px; cursor: pointer; } .toggle-navigationv2 ul{ list-style-type: none; margin: 0; padding: 0; } .toggle-navigationv2 ul ul li a{ padding-left: 35px; background:#ffffff; display: inline-block } .toggle-navigationv2 ul li a{ padding: 15px 25px; width: 100%; display: inline-block; background: #fafafa; font-size: 14px; border-bottom: 1px solid #efefef;color:#0a89c0;} .close-nav{ font-size: 12px; background: rgba(0,0,0,0.25); letter-spacing: 1px; display: inline-block; padding: 10px; border-radius: 100px; line-height: 8px; margin: 14px;color: #ffffff; position:relative; right:0px; } .close-nav:hover{ background: rgba(0,0,0,0.45);} .toggle-navigation ul{ list-style-type: none; margin: 0; padding: 0; display: inline-block; width: 100% } .menu-all-pages-container:after{ content: ""; clear: both } .toggle-navigation ul li{ font-size: 13px; border-bottom: 1px solid rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.11); padding: 11px 0px; width: 25%; float: left; text-align: center; margin-top: 6px } .toggle-navigation ul ul{ display: none } .toggle-navigation ul li a{ color: #eee; padding: 15px; } .toggle-navigation{ display: none; background: #444; } .toggle-text{ color: #fff; font-size: 12px; text-transform: uppercase; letter-spacing: 3px; display: inherit; text-align: center; } .toggle-text:before{ content: "..."; font-size: 32px; font-family: georgia; line-height: 0px; margin-left: 0px; letter-spacing: 1px; top: -3px; position: relative; padding-right: 10px; } .nav_container:hover + .toggle-navigation, .toggle-navigation:hover, .toggle-navigation:active, .toggle-navigation:focus{ display: inline-block; width: 100%; } /* Category 2 */ .category-widget-wrapper{ padding:30px 15% 10px 15% } .amp-category-block ul{ list-style-type:none;padding:0 } .amp-category-block-btn{ display: block; text-align: center; font-size: 13px; margin-top: 15px; border-bottom: 1px solid #f1f1f1; text-decoration: none; padding-bottom: 8px;} .category-widget-gutter h4{ margin-bottom: 0px;} .category-widget-gutter ul{ margin-top: 10px; list-style-type:none; padding:0 } .amp-category-post{ width: 32%;display: inline-block; word-wrap: break-word;float: left;} .amp-category-post amp-img{ margin-bottom:5px; } .amp-category-block li:nth-child(3){ margin: 0 1%;} .searchmenu{ right: 15px; } .searchmenu{ top: 31%; position: absolute; } .searchmenu button{ background:transparent; border:none } .closebutton{ background: transparent; border: 0; color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.7); border: 1px solid rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.7); border-radius: 30px; width: 32px; height: 32px; font-size: 12px; text-align: center; position: absolute; top: 12px; right: 20px; outline:none } amp-lightbox{ background: rgba(0, 0, 0,0.85); } /* CSS3 icon */ [class*=icono-]:after, [class*=icono-]:before { content: ''; pointer-events: none; } .icono-search:before{ position: absolute; left: 50%; -webkit-transform: rotate(270deg); -ms-transform: rotate(270deg); transform: rotate(270deg); width: 2px; height: 9px; box-shadow: inset 0 0 0 32px; top: 0px; border-radius: 0 0 1px 1px; left: 14px; } [class*=icono-] { display: inline-block; vertical-align: middle; position: relative; font-style: normal; color: #f42; text-align: left; text-indent: -9999px; direction: ltr } .headerlogo a, [class*=icono-]{ color: #F42F42 } /* Pagination */ .amp-wp-content.pagination-holder { background: none; padding: 0; box-shadow: none; height: auto; min-height: auto; } #pagination{ width: 100%; margin-top: 15px; } #pagination .next{ float: right;max-width:50%;text-align: right;} #pagination .prev{ float: left;max-width:50%; } #pagination .next a, #pagination .prev a{ margin-bottom: 12px; -moz-border-radius: 2px; -webkit-border-radius: 2px; border-radius: 2px; -moz-box-shadow: 0 2px 3px rgba(0,0,0,.05); -webkit-box-shadow: 0 2px 3px rgba(0,0,0,.05); box-shadow: 0 2px 3px rgba(0,0,0,.05); padding: 11px 15px; font-size: 12px;} #pagination .next a, #pagination .prev a{ color:#666666; background:#fefefe; display:inline-block; } /* Sticky Social bar in Single */ .ampforwp-social-icons-wrapper{ margin: 0.65em 0px 0.65em 0px; height: 28px; } .s_so{ width: 100%; bottom: 0; display: block; left: 0; box-shadow: 0px 4px 7px #000; background: #fff; padding: 7px 0px 0px 0px; position: fixed; margin: 0; z-index: 10; text-align: center; } .a-so-i{ width: 50px; height: 28px; display: inline-block; background: #5cbe4a;position: relative; top: -8px; padding-top: 0px; margin-bottom:5px; } .a-so-i amp-img{ top: 4px; } amp-social-share[type="facebookmessenger"] { background-image: url(https://img.icons8.com/color/100/000000/facebook-messenger.png); max-height: 33px; } .custom-amp-socialsharing-line{background:#00b900} /* Header */ header.container{line-height: 0;} #header{ background: #fff; text-align: center;padding:17px 0px 17px 0px;display: inline-block;width: 100%;position:relative} #header h1{ text-align: center; font-size: 20px; font-weight: bold; line-height: 1; padding: 4px 3px; margin: 0; } .amp-logo{left: 0;right: 0;display:inline-block} .amp-logo amp-img{ margin: 15px 0px 10px 0px; } .amp-logo amp-img{margin: 0 auto;} main { padding: 30px 15% 10px 15%; } .amp-wp-content.widget-wrapper{padding:12px 10px 10px 10px;} main .amp-wp-content{ margin-bottom: 12px; padding: 15px; } .amp-loop-list, .featured-image-content, .the_content, .taxonomy-description, .taxonomy-image{background: #fff; -moz-border-radius: 2px; -webkit-border-radius: 2px; border-radius: 2px; -moz-box-shadow: 0 2px 3px rgba(0,0,0,.05); -webkit-box-shadow: 0 2px 3px rgba(0,0,0,.05); box-shadow: 0 2px 3px rgba(0,0,0,.05);} .home-post_image{ float: right; margin-left: 15px; margin-bottom: -6px; } .amp-wp-title{ margin-top: 0px; } h2.amp-wp-title , h3.amp-wp-title{ line-height: 30px; } h2.amp-wp-title a , h3.amp-wp-title a{ font-weight: 300; color: #000; font-size: 20px; } h2.amp-wp-title , h3.amp-wp-title , .amp-wp-post-content p{ margin: 0 0 0 5px; word-wrap: break-word;} /* For Excerpt */ .amp-wp-post-content .large-screen-excerpt, .amp-wp-post-content .small-screen-excerpt { display: block; } .amp-wp-post-content p{ font-size: 12px; color: #999; line-height: 20px; margin: 3px 0 0 5px; } main .amp-archive-heading{ background : none; box-shadow: none; padding: 5px; } .amp-sub-archives li{width: 50%;} .amp-sub-archives ul{padding: 0;list-style: none;display: flex;font-size: 12px;line-height: 1.2;margin: 5px 0 10px 0px;}.page-title{font-size: 1.17em;padding: 6px 0;} /* Footer */ #footer{ background: #FFFFFF; font-size: 13px; text-align: center; letter-spacing: 0.2px; padding: 20px 0;color: #222222;} #footer a{color:#0074A7;} #footer p:first-child{ margin-bottom: 12px; } #footer p{ margin: 0 } .footer_menu ul{ list-style-type: none; padding: 0; text-align: center; margin: 0px 20px 25px 20px; line-height: 27px; font-size: 13px } .footer_menu ul li{ display:inline; margin:0 10px; } .footer_menu ul li:first-child{ margin-left:0 } .footer_menu ul li:last-child{ margin-right:0 } .footer_menu ul ul{ display:none } a.btt:hover { cursor: pointer; } .nav_container { background: rgba(0,0,0,0)} .nav_container a, .nav_container a:hover, .nav_container a:focus{ color:#ffffff } /* Single */ .cmt-button-wrapper{ margin-bottom: 0px; margin-top: 60px; text-align:center } .cmt-button-wrapper a{ color: #fff; background: #312c7e; font-size: 13px; padding: 10px 20px 10px 20px; box-shadow: 0 0px 3px rgba(0,0,0,.04); border-radius: 80px; } h1.amp-wp-title , h2.amp-wp-title{ text-align: center; margin: 0.7em 0px 0.6em 0px; font-size: 1.5em; } .amp-wp-content.post-title-meta, .amp-wp-content.post-pagination-meta{ background: none; padding: 0; box-shadow:none } .post-pagination-meta{ min-height:75px } .single-post .post-pagination-meta{ min-height:auto } .single-post .ampforwp-social-icons{ display:block } .post-pagination-meta .amp-wp-tax-category, .post-title-meta .amp-wp-tax-tag{ display : none; } .amp-meta-wrapper{ border-bottom: 1px solid #DADADA; padding-bottom:10px; display:inline-block; width:100%; margin-bottom:0 } .amp-wp-meta{ padding-left: 0; } .amp-wp-tax-category{ float:right } .amp-wp-tax-tag, .amp-wp-meta li{ list-style: none; display: inline-block; } li.amp-wp-tax-category{ float: right } .amp-wp-byline, .amp-wp-posted-on{ float: left } .amp-wp-content amp-img{ max-width: 100%; } figure{ margin: 0; } figcaption{ font-size: 11px; margin-bottom: 11px; background: #eee; padding: 6px 8px;text-align:center; } .amp-wp-author:before{ content: "By "; color: #555; } .amp-wp-author{ margin-right: 1px; } .amp-wp-meta{ font-size: 12px; color: #555; } .amp-wp-author-name:before{content:'By';} .amp-ad-wrapper{ text-align: center } .single-post main{ padding:12px 15% 10px 15% } .the_content p{ margin-top: 5px; color: #333; font-size: 15px; line-height: 26px; margin-bottom: 15px;word-break: break-word; } .the_content small{font-size:11px;line-height:1.2;color:#111;margin-bottom: 5px;display: inline-block;} .amp-wp-tax-tag{ font-size: 13px; border: 0; display: inline-block; margin: 0.5em 0px 0.7em 0px; width: 100%; } main .amp-wp-content.featured-image-content{ padding: 0px; border: 0; margin-bottom: 0; box-shadow: none;text-align: center; } .amp-wp-article-featured-image amp-img {margin: 0 auto;} .amp-wp-article-featured-image.wp-caption .wp-caption-text, .ampforwp-gallery-item .wp-caption-text{color: #696969; font-size: 11px; line-height: 15px; background: #eee; margin: 0; padding: .66em .75em; text-align: center;} .ampforwp-gallery-item.amp-carousel-slide { padding-bottom: 20px;} .amp-wp-content.post-pagination-meta{ max-width: 1030px;margin:0 auto; } .single-post .ampforwp-social-icons.ampforwp-social-icons-wrapper{ margin: 0.9em auto 0.9em auto ; max-width: 1030px; } .amp-wp-article-header.amp-wp-article-category.ampforwp-meta-taxonomy{ margin: 10px auto; max-width: 1030px; } .ampforwp_single_excerpt { margin-bottom:15px; font-size: 15px; text-align:center} .single-post .amp_author_area amp-img{ margin: 0; float: left; margin-right: 12px; border-radius: 60px; } .single-post .amp_author_area .amp_author_area_wrapper{ display: inline-block; width: 100%; line-height: 1.4; margin-top: 2px; font-size: 13px; color:#333;} .a-so-twitter{background:#1da1f2} .a-so-i-rounded-author {padding: 10px 0px 10px 10px;display: inline-table;border-radius: 50%;cursor: pointer;} /* Related Posts */ main .amp-wp-content.relatedpost{ background: none; box-shadow: none; max-width: 1030px; padding:0px 0 0 0; margin:1.8em auto 1.5em auto } .rp .related-title, .cmts_list h3{ font-size: 14px; font-weight: bold; letter-spacing: 0.4px; margin: 15px 0 10px 0; color: #333; } .rp .related-title { display: block; } .rp ol{ list-style-type:none; margin:0; padding:0 } .rp ol li{ display:inline-block; width:100%; margin-bottom: 12px; background: #fefefe; -moz-border-radius: 2px; -webkit-border-radius: 2px; border-radius: 2px; -moz-box-shadow: 0 2px 3px rgba(0,0,0,.05); -webkit-box-shadow: 0 2px 3px rgba(0,0,0,.05); box-shadow: 0 2px 3px rgba(0,0,0,.05); padding: 0px; } .rp .related_link{ margin-top:18px; margin-bottom:10px; margin-right:10px } .rp .related_link a{ font-weight: 300; color: #000; font-size: 18px; } .rp ol li amp-img{ width:100px; float:left; margin-right:15px } .rp ol li p{ font-size: 12px; color: #999; line-height: 1.2; margin: 12px 0 0 0;word-break: break-word;} .no_related_thumbnail{ padding: 15px 18px; } .no_related_thumbnail .related_link{ margin: 16px 18px 20px 19px; } /* Comments */ .page-numbers{padding: 9px 10px;background: #fff;font-size: 14px} .ampforwp-comment-wrapper{margin:1.8em 0px 1.5em 0px} main .amp-wp-content.cmts_list {background: none;box-shadow: none;max-width: 1030px;padding:0} .cmts_list div{ display:inline-block;} .cmts_list ul{ margin:0;padding:0} .cmts_list ul.children{ padding-bottom:10px; margin-left: 4%; width: 96%;} .cmts_list ul li p{ margin:0;font-size:15px;clear:both;padding-top:16px; word-break: break-word;} .cmts_list ul li{ font-size:13px;list-style-type:none; margin-bottom: 12px; background: #fefefe; -moz-border-radius: 2px; -webkit-border-radius: 2px; border-radius: 2px; -moz-box-shadow: 0 2px 3px rgba(0,0,0,.05); -webkit-box-shadow: 0 2px 3px rgba(0,0,0,.05); box-shadow: 0 2px 3px rgba(0,0,0,.05);padding: 0px;max-width: 1000px;width:100%;} .cmts_list ul li .cmt-body{ padding: 25px;width: 91%;} .cmts_list ul li .cmt-body .cmt-author{ margin-right:5px} .cmt-author{ float:left } .cmt-author-img{float: left; margin-right: 5px; border-radius: 60px;} .single-post footer.cmt-meta{ padding-bottom: 0; line-height: 1.7;} .cmts_list li li{ margin: 20px 20px 10px 20px;background: #f7f7f7;box-shadow: none;border: 1px solid #eee;} .cmts_list li li li{ margin:20px 20px 10px 20px} .cmt-content amp-img{max-width: 300px;} .amp-facebook-comments{margin-top:45px} /* ADS */ .amp_home_body .amp_ad_1{ margin-top: 10px; margin-bottom: -20px; } .single-post .amp_ad_1{ margin-top: 10px; margin-bottom: -20px; } html .single-post .ampforwp-incontent-ad-1 { margin-bottom: 10px; } .amp-ad-4{ margin-top:10px; } .amp-wp-content blockquote { border-left: 3px solid; margin: 0; padding: 15px 20px 8px 24px; background: #f3f3f3; } pre { white-space: pre-wrap; } /* Tables */ table { display: -webkit-box; display: -ms-flexbox; display: flex; -ms-flex-wrap: wrap; flex-wrap: wrap; overflow-x: auto; } table a:link { font-weight: bold; text-decoration: none; } table a:visited { color: #999999; font-weight: bold; text-decoration: none; } table a:active, table a:hover { color: #bd5a35; text-decoration: underline; } table { color: #666; font-size: 12px; text-shadow: 1px 1px 0px #fff; background: inherit; margin: 0px; width: 95%; } table th { padding: 21px 25px 22px 25px; border-top: 1px solid #fafafa; border-bottom: 1px solid #e0e0e0; background: #ededed; background: -webkit-gradient(linear, left top, left bottom, from(#ededed), to(#ebebeb)); background: -moz-linear-gradient(top, #ededed, #ebebeb); } table th:first-child { text-align: left; padding-left: 20px; } table tr:first-child th:first-child { -moz-border-radius-topleft: 3px; -webkit-border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; } table tr:first-child th:last-child { -moz-border-radius-topright: 3px; -webkit-border-top-right-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; } table tr { text-align: center; padding-left: 20px;border: 2px solid #eee; } table td:first-child { text-align: left; padding-left: 20px; border-left: 0; } table td { padding: 18px; border-top: 1px solid #ffffff; border-bottom: 1px solid #e0e0e0; border-left: 1px solid #e0e0e0; background: #fafafa; background: -webkit-gradient(linear, left top, left bottom, from(#fbfbfb), to(#fafafa)); background: -moz-linear-gradient(top, #fbfbfb, #fafafa); } table tr.even td { background: #f6f6f6; background: -webkit-gradient(linear, left top, left bottom, from(#f8f8f8), to(#f6f6f6)); background: -moz-linear-gradient(top, #f8f8f8, #f6f6f6); } table tr:last-child td {border-bottom: 0;} table tr:last-child td:first-child { -moz-border-radius-bottomleft: 3px; -webkit-border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; } table tr:last-child td:last-child { -moz-border-radius-bottomright: 3px; -webkit-border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; } table tr:hover td { background: #f2f2f2; background: -webkit-gradient(linear, left top, left bottom, from(#f2f2f2), to(#f0f0f0)); background: -moz-linear-gradient(top, #f2f2f2, #f0f0f0); } .hide-meta-info{ display: none; } /* Responsive */ @media screen and (min-width: 650px) { table {display: inline-table;} } @media screen and (max-width: 800px) { .single-post main{ padding: 12px 10px 10px 10px } } @media screen and (max-width: 630px) { .related_link { margin: 16px 18px 20px 19px; } .amp-category-post {line-height: 1.45;font-size: 14px; } .amp-category-block li:nth-child(3) {margin:0 0.6%} } @media screen and (max-width: 510px) { .ampforwp-tax-category span{ display:none } .rp ol li p{ line-height: 1.6; margin: 7px 0 0 0; } .rp .related_link { margin: 17px 18px 17px 19px; } .cmts_list ul li .cmt-body{ width:auto } } @media screen and (max-width: 425px) { .alignright, .alignleft {float: none;} .rp .related_link { margin: 13px 18px 14px 19px; } .rp .related_link a{ font-size: 18px; line-height: 1.7; } .amp-meta-wrapper{ display: inline-block; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-top: 8px; width:100% } .ampforwp-tax-category{ padding-bottom:0 } h1.amp-wp-title{ margin: 16px 0px 13px 0px; } .amp-wp-byline{ padding:0 } .rp .related_link a { font-size: 17px; line-height: 1.5; } .amp-wp-post-content .large-screen-excerpt, .related_link .large-screen-excerpt {display:none;} } @media screen and (max-width: 375px) { #pagination .next a, #pagination .prev a{ padding: 10px 6px; font-size: 11px; color: #666; } .rp .related-title, .cmts_list h3{ margin-top:15px; } #pagination .next{ margin-bottom:15px;} .rp .related_link a { font-size: 15px; line-height: 1.6; } } @media screen and (max-width: 340px) { .rp .related_link a { font-size: 15px; } .single-post main{ padding: 10px 5px 10px 5px } .the_content .amp-ad-wrapper{ text-align: center; margin-left: -13px; } .amp-category-post {line-height: 1.45;font-size: 12px; } .amp-category-block li:nth-child(3) {margin:0%} } @media screen and (max-width: 320px) { .rp .related_link a { font-size: 13px; } h1.amp-wp-title{ font-size:17px; padding:0px 4px } } @media screen and (max-width: 400px) { .amp-wp-title{ font-size: 19px; margin: 21px 10px -1px 10px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 767px) { .amp-wp-post-content .small-screen-excerpt { display: block; } main, .amp-category-block, .category-widget-wrapper{ padding: 15px 18px 0px 18px; } .toggle-navigation ul li{ width: 50% } #pagination .next{ width:100%;} #pagination .prev{ float: none;width:100%; } } @media screen and (max-width: 495px) { h2.amp-wp-title a{ font-size: 17px; line-height: 26px;} } .amp-wp-tax-tag a, a, .amp-wp-author, .headerlogo a, [class*=icono-] { color: #0a89c0;; } body a {color: #0a89c0 } .amp-wp-content blockquote{ border-color:#0a89c0;; } .cmt-button-wrapper a { background: #0a89c0;; } amp-user-notification { border-color: #0a89c0;; } amp-user-notification button { background-color: #0a89c0;; } .single-post footer { padding-bottom: 40px; } .amp-ad-2{ margin-bottom: 50px; } .body.single-post .s_so{z-index:99999;} .body.single-post .adsforwp-stick-ad, .body.single-post amp-sticky-ad{padding-top:4px;padding-bottom:48px;} .body.single-post .ampforwp-sticky-custom-ad{ bottom: 43px; 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    Todd Glider
  • 8 years ago
    • Categories: Articles

The Donald Trump VR Porn Sex Tape (A Parody)

The 2D version of our Donald Trump sex tape. A little background: we produced a Virtual Reality Donald Trump sex tape parody, featuring Donald, his wife and Sarah Palin. Casting for Melania and Sarah was not so difficult–though we cycled through several porn stars 24 hours before the shoot–which was not surprising. The difficulty casting the Donald Trump was, however, unexpected. Keep in mind that since it’s VR Porn from Donald’s POV, we didn’t need to cast someone who looked like Trump. We just needed a male porn star with a torso similar to Trump’s–pasty, pudgy.

Not so easy, it turned out. Every male porn star has washboard abs these days. So we found someone last minute with an appropriate physique. Unfortunately, he was unable to maintain an erection during the shoot. On the one hand, this was disappointing, as that meant that Melania Trump and Sarah Palin had to pretty much do everything. On the other hand, it seemed appropriate, the fact that the candidate could not get it up. Anyway, we also flew in a proper Donald Trump impersonator from Florida to provide overdubs for the VR scene, and to star in this parody of a press conference in which he reveals that a VR sex tape was leaked, that he’s going to sue everyone, and that the video is hyuuuuge.

Here’s the YouTube version.

And here’s the original script for the press conference. Warning: It changed pretty dramatically on the day of shooting:

INT. ASSEMBLY HALL – DAY

Podium with Trump regalia. Behind the podium, a US flag and a California flag. Behind the flag, a curtain suggesting that there is a stage behind the curtain. An expressionless SECRET SERVICE AGENT in sunglasses stands to the right of the podium. A microphone on the podium sits silently. A Gear VR headset brandished with BaDoinkVR logo is somewhere in arm’s reach of the podium, but out of sight.

Dressing the podium, signage that reads “TRUMP MAKE AMERICA GAPE AGAIN”. In the foreground, the backs of heads of SUPPORTERS. They clap, cheer, mutter and wave TRUMP CAMPAIGN POSTERS.

Subil Arch starring as Melania Trump!

After we establish, O/S an EMCEE is heard.

EMCEE
Ladies and Gentlemen, the next president of the United States…Donald J. Trump!

DONALD TRUMP, followed by MELANIA TRUMP, enters from stage left.

VFX: Flash bulbs

The supporters grow more impassioned, getting a little louder, waving their signs with more enthusiasm. Trump stands behind the podium, nodding, smiling, waving at the crowd. Melania stands to his left, facing the crowd, smiling.

DONALD TRUMP
Unbelievable. Wow. I love you. I love, Los Angeles. Love Love Love. Thank you very much. What an honor.

Trump jovially motions for the crowd to relax, settle down. They obey. The cheering dies down.

DONALD TRUMP
Thank you! We set this up a couple hours ago. And it’s great. It’s great. This is incredible. And you know there are thousands of people out here…we’ve got to get a bigger tent! This is my beautiful wife Melania—You all know my beautiful wife. She’s beautiful, isn’t she. Just look at her. Turn so they can see your beautiful boobies, Melania. Beautiful boobies. Have you seen her big beautiful boobs?

Melania turns to face her husband so she, and her bust, is in profile.

DONALD TRUMP
(gazing at Melania’s attributes) Will you look at that. I mean, come on. Very nice, sweetheart.(turns back to crowd) Best $10,000 I ever spent. It’s true. And you’re going to see more of them. A lot more. From my time in Hollywood, I know that’s called a teaser, isn’t it. It is. I spent a lot of time in Hollywood. A lot of friends out here. Great people. This isn’t going to come as a shock to anyone, but Melania and I have a lot of fun in the bedroom. Don’t we, sweetheart? We do. And if you don’t believe that, you will soon. You will. Because I was informed a couple of hours ago that a teeny tiny sex tape was leaked on Porbhub.

The crowd gasps.

Edyn Blair stars as Sarah Palin

DONALD TRUMP
And that brings me to why I am here today. I don’t know how the people at Pornhub got this tape, but it was illegally obtained, and I plan to sue the pants off them.  Literally.  They will have to pay me so much money, that they won’t be able to afford pants anymore. That’s right.  Nobody violates Donald Trump and gets away with it. So Pornhub – I’m coming for you, literally. But don’t get me wrong – I’m not embarrassed.  The tape, it’s great. No, it is. It’s great. Really. We used the greatest, most sophisticated technology available – virtual reality. You’re going to be amazed. Trust me. And the best part is – I’m in it. Of course I’m in it. Melania, my wife, is on the tape. And a good friend of ours from Alaska, she’s on the tape, too. And this tape being out there, it is a shock, sure. But it’s an opportunity also. Now the American people will know there definitely isn’t a problem down there. Little Marco, if you’re watching this, go to bed. The adults are talking.

Trump pauses as the crowd laughs.

DONALD TRUMP
And you’re going to love it, trust me. You will. Especially if you’re an evangelical. I love you, Evangelicals. Believe me. I love you. This is the greatest sex tape in the world. And it’s very advanced. Very smart. It’s virtual reality. So you need a pair of goggles. Like this.

Trump picks up a Gear VR headset brandished with BADOINKVR logo and presses them to his head. 

DONALD TRUMP
Don’t I look handsome in these? And presidential? Melania? How handsome am I?

Trump removes the goggles from his eyes, and the crowd applauds as he places them back on the podium.

Donald Trump impersonator reveals leak to press!

DONALD TRUMP
Great. Really, really great. But I am going to sue Pornhub for all the money they have. And I’m going to sue BaDoinkVR. And I’m going to sue Kink.com while I’m at it. And I’ll win. I’ll win all the lawsuits. Trust me. I always win. I do. And one more thing: We’re still going to build that wall, and it’s going to be a great one. So when you watch this tape, and you will. You’ll love it. It’s great. When you watch the tape you may see somebody crawling across a southern border or two, but that border is not Mexico. If you know what I mean. And I know you do. When the media calls me sexist I have to laugh. I employ so many women. And they’re great. This tape proves something I’ve been saying all along: I won the battle of the sexes in a great big landslide.

Trump pauses as the crowd applauds.

DONALD TRUMP
Thank you. Thank you. We’re going to make America gape again in November. Thank you. Thank you, everybody.

The crowd cheers, claps, waves their campaign posters. Donald exits stage left, pinching Melania’s ass as he passes her. She follows him out of frame. As the Secret Service man passes the podium to exit stage left, we FADE.

Tags: BaDoinkVRDonald TrumpMelania TrumpParodypornographyPOVSarah PalinVirtual RealityVirtual Reality PornVR contentVR PornVR porn videosVR pornography
Todd Glider: I serve as CEO of CM Productions, LLC, the company behind global brands BaDoink.com and BaDoinkVR.com, among others. Founded in 2006, BaDoink initially launched as an innovative adult entertainment site with a proprietary tech platform enabling users to view and wirelessly transfer videos to any device. In 2015, BaDoink entered the burgeoning VR sector, developing a virtual reality entertainment solution for adult consumers.BaDoinkVR.com updates with new scenes weekly, and features 360° and 180° immersive 3D videos with motion tracking, binaural audio and more. In 1998, I got my start in the IT sector as Creative Director of seminal e-Commerce company Interactive Telecom Network, Inc. I later served as CEO of European traffic program EuroRevenue. Todd holds an M.F.A. from the University of Miami.

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